Wednesday, July 3, 2013

IWSG: Hanging in there

It's that time of month again! Time for IWSG: Insecure Writers Support Group, brain child of Alex J. Cavanaugh.

This week has been a rough one. It’s one of those weeks where life just keeps shoveling the crap on top as I try desperately to dig my way out only to have more crap flung in my face.  It’s one of those weeks where you look back and ponder what you could have, should have, and would have done better. I’m clinging to the things that make me happy, but today I feel like a cat hanging on to a ceiling fan blade, trying not to get flung off.

It’s times like these that I cling to my writing, and after the ‘oh woe is me’ discussion I had with my mom last night I feel it’s the right thing for me to be doing right now.

Yes, I’m depressed, I doubt my abilities, and I often think of myself as a hack trying to make it among the truly talented, but if I allow myself to give up, to not even try, then that is exactly what I am.

I confessed to my mother that I felt I was talent-less, that I would never amount to anything. She reassured me that my talent was in writing, so long as I quit doubting myself. She told me to keep at it, even though it was hard, that my writing resonated with my emotions and touched the people who read it. I don’t know if that is true, but if I don’t keep trying, I will never know.

So my ceiling fan blade this week will be my writing, and I am hanging on for dear life.


  1. Your mother sounds like a wise lady! I think most writers, even very successful writers go through doubts just like you (and I.) If anything your doubts prove you are a writer! Keep at it and I'm sure you'll get there :)

  2. But the cat gets up, gives itself a good cleaning, and gets on with business.
    Talent is there. I can see it in your post. The fact that doubt is a part of it only means that you have joined all the rest of the writer community! It is our constant companion at every stage. If you let it take hold and grow, then it will win.

    But if you snarl, bare you teeth, and tell it to, "Move! Or I swear I'll run you over," well then, you have shown it who is Boss!
    CD Coffelt ponders at Spirit Called
    And critiques at UnicornBell

  3. Your mother sounds like mother. ;) Must be a mom thing. She is right, though. (I know we hate to admit it.) You are awesome and very talented. I've discovered talent is less about brilliance and more about perseverance, endurance and the work you are willing to put into something.

    I've been feeling like a talentless hack myself these days. But I keep writing because I love my stories (most of the time) and have an insane hope that others will too. And they will love your stories if you do!

    Hang on and don't let the fan blade win!

  4. I am with you in feeling like a "hack trying to make it among the truely talented". I don't know if I'm talented. I hope I am because I love writing. I'm glad that found support from your mom. She sounds wonderful. I hope that the rest of your life calms down. Enjoy your writing!

  5. One of my favorite quotes (because I can so relate to how you're feeling, oh my yes): Don't worry about what other people think. And work harder. Persistence almost always trumps talent." -- Daniel Pink

    Just reminds me I need to be persistent, not the best.

  6. WInston Churchill once famously said, "Never quit!" So don't. You'll never get better or know what you can achieve by quitting. Work closely with other writers to make yourself better, and read lots of books on craft. If I could do it enough to get published, so can you. Believe!

    ~ Alex's July IWSG minion, Nancy

  7. I hear you, Amy. Every time I open my WIP, I start thinking there's so much left to do--and this is my tenth draft! It's so discouraging if I let myself think about it, but I just have to focus on one day at a time and one scene at a time. It's helped me get past some days where I really think I have no talent and why am I doing this?

    But, seriously, listen to your mother. If you have a passion for writing and any amount of talent for it, hard work and dedication goes a long way. Keep writing and don't let that ceiling fan swing you around too long! Sometimes, you have to let go, dust yourself off and start over. :-)